Sarang says..

Becker Incorporated

2010-08-22T18:21:00.000-07:00

"I had my first anger management class and I was pissed as hell". This very antithetical rhetoric rings clearly in my head. Different folks interpret life differently. Some keep prognosticating about the times ahead, some keep thinking about some dreary past events and others are whining about the present. And then there is Becker. "Becker" is a sitcom which ran for a couple of seasons on TV.
Becker is one man who never ceases to amaze me. His philosophy about life is as simple as it gets- "Don't say YES when you want to say NO". In everyday life, people try to keep their serenity and work their way through problems, keeping their head down. On the other hand,Becker is one guy who is a straight shooter. His vociferous comments about everything and everyone around him make him look like a jerk. But he is actually being blatantly honest about the people around him. The reason? He seems to connect with everyone in his own way, thus trying to make them look at the world through his eyes.
Be it the diner owner Regie or his apartment super, Bob. Regie is an ex-super model whose father bequeathed her just one gift before dying- an old derelict diner located in Bronx - a place with no rules and where there is little respect for authority. Regie keeps complaining about the lack of customers and Becker responds with his comments about lack of quality food! Bob, his super is a narcissistic guy who is a pucca-moocher. Whenever Becker asks Bob if he could fix his apartment, he replies with - "You are on the list!". In one of the episodes, Becker actually corners Bob and asks him about the list. Bob responds "You got me!! There is no list!". Jake is another one of Becker's "buddies", who sells magazines and cigarettes for a living. Despite losing his eyesight, Jake has a surprisingly positive attitude towards life and does not miss a chance to pull Becker's legs.
Becker is a kind of egomaniac with a heart. He went to Harvard and believes that none of the other colleges stand up to that kind of repute. He is quite nonchalant about other medical practitioners like chiropractors. As luck would have it, once he ends up with a sore back and finds himself in a Chinese Massage Parlor for treatment! His colleagues at the clinic seem to like him despite his egocentric behavior. Margaret, does a lot of bookkeeping for Becker and almost acts like his private nanny. Linda, who doubles up as a store keeper and receptionist does...well..nothing! The essence of this sitcom is about a man who likes to say "I told you so!" almost all the time. Becker has a few friends whom he trusts completely and its this set of loyal friends that help him overcome his problems.
IF folks like Becker ended up in a corporate environment, they would run havoc. As Chanakya said, "Straight trees are cut first". Becker is affirmative when he calls a spade, a spade. But conventional wisdom suggests that being politically naive won't really help to survive in the corporate world. Not everyone can be a friend and not everyone can be trusted. Getting the job done is more important, rather than focus sing on the minutiae. Becker can be a good individual contributor, but not a good team player. Becker's philosophy of playing it straight might not be liked by some of the guys in the board room. To conclude, I recall an anecdote about two corporate whiz kids working at Nike. These blokes were enjoying a nice sunny day somewhere in Africa, trotting down a trail with green meadows and thick grass around them. Suddenly, a lion appeared from nowhere, right in the middle of the trail. Both were shit-scared. One of them, for some strange reason started to unpack his bag, taking out a pair of Nike shoes. He started wearing them and tying the laces at a frenetic pace. The other guy asked him, "What good is that going to do? Do you really think that with those Nike shoes you are going to run any faster than that Lion?". The other guy gave back a quick repartee - "Who said anything about the Lion? I just want to make sure I run faster than you!!".

SAW tooth :(

2009-08-20T20:30:00.000-07:00

The stage is set for an encounter...one of its kind. A clash of the titans would best describe this combat. 32 soldiers, and just one enemy. Seems easy, but it's complex, with the enemy armed to the...err...TEETH. His weapons are drills, cotton bandits and a whole set of sharpnels. Well, this is the way I felt after a visit to my old friend and "foe", the dentist.
The term "dentist" brings back some really bad memories for most of us who have been on the next worst thing to the electric chair. Your jaws ache, your cheeks start to show cramps and you are literally "moved" to tears!! One of my earliest visits were for a root canal, for one of my molars. It all started when I felt a sharp pain when trying to chew a sandwich. After setting up the appointment, I went on the D-day to the clinic. After entering, the lady at the counter explained to me the course of treatment etc. When it came to fees, the transaction seemed to be expensive. Nevertheless, I took the plunge and went ahead with what was to be a "memorable" evening.
"Hi, My name is Asia, I would be assisting the doc for the rest of the evening." Trying to confirm if I had heard correctly, I asked her for her name. "Asia, like the continent", came the reply. She indeed did live upto her name (esp. in terms of size).She was the male version of the incredible hulk, sans the green skin. This afro-american amazon shook my hand and the next moment I was trying to escape this vice-like grip. "GOD! If this is the start, I would rather take off..",I said to myself. As I tried to make myself comfortable, the doctor arrived. She seemed to have the look of a kindergarten teacher who is mad at her students' throwing paper planes at her. The procedure began with me getting a nice prick with the needle of the size of my palm. Gradually, the numbness crept in surreptitiously into my cheeks and the cleaning began. Before that, Asia assumed her "missionary" position alongside the doctor to help with instruments. For some weird reason, she had a huge set of goggles on her eyes. To me she appeared like one of the villains from the 1980's who had their lines like "Saara shehar mujhe Loin ke naam se jaanta hai". My head was already a bit dizzy. The doc said,"Hey Asia, can you shift his head towards you? I need a better view of the teeth". Well, i was expecting a gentle nudge or maybe a tender push to shift my almost-numb head. The next few seconds was an experience I would never forget for my lifetime. Asia thrust her powerful hand into my cheek, held it firm and just pulled the same towards her. The momentum of this action was so much that it shifted the rest of my body towards her!!! It was raw power at it's best.The checkup after the root canal was the last step. The doc asked me whether I had any wisdom teeth removed etc. And even before I could respond, she said "Never mind..". This kinda was outrageous in a way. Do I belong to the type who donot or rather cannot have a wisdom tooth? Taking it a level further, is it a rule that only people who are wise have wisdom teeth? Well, we can leave that area for another post or a debate.Finally, the operation ended with water jet sprays and a pat on my back for being so brave.
While watching "Seinfeld", Jerry says that the top two fears humans have are Public Speaking and Death. Public Speaking, apparently has a higher rating than death! Personally, I would say that a visit to the dentist is the worst of all. It's like you go in, get hammered, people dig holes and bury them in your mouth. Worst of all, you have to pay for this torture and at the end of it, after an year or so, you go for a checkup to find the same tooth's neighbour now has started shaking. There you go! Another round of water jets, smelly substances and long hours of keeping your mouth open.To conclude, I would say that at the final frontier,the Lord would send good people to heaven and those you have sinned, be sent to the dentist!!

Marry-go-round!

2008-12-12T17:42:00.000-08:00

"A caring and family oriented girl with simple living and high thinking"..."I got a first class throughout my career with 99% in tenth standard"..."Looking for Mr.cool and handsome". All these headlines certainly made my head spin. As you might have guessed, I was skimming through "desi" matrimonial sites. The sole reason being curiousity, to learn about how exactly do these portals work and do business. Well, it was certainly entertaining to look at people selling themselves in any and every way possible!The photos looked fake (the expressions i mean) and the profile essays were shameless ripoffs of samples from some of the online essay sites :P
Well, this is one way "desi"(s) look to find "soulmate"(s) and try to make their life easier. "Easier" because it's certainly convenient to find someone online, unlike going through the rigmarole of understanding the other person. Some of the sites might be doing well, given the fact that Indians are fond of a closed system, when it comes to marriage and man-woman relationships. The most famous remark (somewhat caustic) on this system was in our very own desi flick "Pardes". One of the actors remarks that "you guys tether boys and girls separately like they were some kinda animals".
The movie, although made with an honest intention, highlighted the parochial attitude of people from some parts of India. In the flick, just as in real life, the girl goes through the "arranged marriage" process and ends up getting screwed (almost! thanks to King Khan :)). Also the fact that Indians are suckers for the America based "NRI boy with indian cultural values" is quite evident. In fact, my research on these sites took me to one which had a roster of "H1-B approved candidates" (No jokes guys! this is for real!)
Taking a step back, we could really do an analysis on why these sites are so popular. The west does not have such a thing, although they do have lots of online dating sites. India is evolving and has been adopting values from the west. Yet, somehow we seem to be a closed society when it comes to these matters. Still, many communities, indulge in "horoscopes" and "manglik" etc. Apparently, these folks seem to have forgotten the premises on which a marriage ought to be built. The foundation has to be strong committment and understanding and not some celestial bodies whose positions dictate whether or not a marriage can succeed. The west has its own shortcomings, since it has a open society which encourages a "no holds barred" approach. But, its a different society in terms of concepts like "live in" relationship etc, some of which might not find approval in "modern" india as well.
Digressing a bit, "love marriage" is another concept in Indian culture where in two people seem to have found true marital bliss. There are differences between the "arranged" and "love" marriage(s). One advocates understanding a person before entering wedlock while the other has vice versa. The "risk" factor or "instability quotient" is equal on either side. The "love"d one might be a good date, may or may not turn out to be a good spouse. Same is the case with the "arranged" marriage gang. They are ready to move ahead with compromises, to make their marriage work. But, then what is the point if the relationship is based entirely on compromise?
All said and done, there seems to be no magical formula as to why relationships work. If someone could find the panacea to all the relationship based issues, this world would be a better place to live. No hurling of vessels from the kitchen, no heated arguments, no heart burns and no two timing partners......well..that's it.. apparently there seems to be a good lookin dame on shaadi.com....i gotta rush... cya!!

A hunting we will go..

2008-10-10T14:26:00.000-07:00

Picture this – You are standing in the middle of the most brutal battle ever fought. The enemy is a ….well…suit-clad ,smart, bald man in his mid 40’s. His weapons are more penetrating than the tip of a sharpened knife. They are questions which make your head spin! The baldy is hell bent on making you tap out with his volley of queries and make you leave the battle field, hurt and disgraced. Well, that is how a job interview goes ….BAD!.

One fine day, my friend Kris (An MS grad in NYC who was day dreaming about the “American Dream”) got a call. A very sweet voice said “Hi, my name is Kristen Davis and I am calling from ABB Associates”. “A-B-B”, screamed Kris. Quite obvious, given this was his dream company. “I have a job opening for a Software Developer Intern at ABB..blah..blah..blah”. Kris was quite thrilled (partly because he was already imagining about the Kristen gal!) since this was an excellent prospect for an MS grad, to get “experience” and rake in some moolah as well. All said and done, Kris agreed for an interview at ABB’s office in California. He started making plans for California (CA), made calls to all the folks he knew in various parts of CA and started dreaming about the photo he would take against HP and Gates buildings at Stanford University. The day arrived, and this dude boarded the flight to CA, tuned in to a song he had chosen for this “special” occasion (first trip to California!) which was “Hotel California”. One the day of the interview, ensuring that he looked spiffy, Kris called a cab (being a desi, he would never have called one…. but this was being reimbursed!). Kris arrived at ABB’s plush office, and was astounded by the architecture around, the glass design and also the hot blonde receptionist who noticed his ogling (man’s favorite pastime) and asked him “What can I do for you?”. Kris muttered the details and was escorted for the first of his 4 rounds of interviews that day.

Round One- A well dressed gentleman came into the room and shook hands with our friend. Confidence personified, Kris was all set to nail this one (after all, he had a GPA of 4+). The gentleman looked to be someone higher up as he introduced himself, “Hi, my name is Kenneth and I am the hiring manager for the Quality Assurance (QA) position which you applied for”. ‘What the hell?”, thought Kris as he was sure this was an interview for a Developer position. But, then he thought, “Let’s take this one as it comes”. The first round was quite pleasant with Kenneth doing all the talking and Kris listening with rapt attention.

Round Two- After a pleasant first round, in came a man who looked a bit like the villain in old Kungfu movies. A tall guy with a long beard who came in and introduced himself
as “Chang”. “I have been in Quality Ass. for a decade and this is what I do for a living”.
This guy gave Kris some goosebumps! Man, for a person who knew nothing about QA to be interviewed by someone with so much experience was nothing less than a duel between David and Goliath. The questions flew left,right and center. Terms like “bugs list”, “white box testing” and “black box testing”. For Kris, this was just like those german war movies his roomie watched which Kris did not understand one bit. “Pardon” and “Excuse Me” alongwith “Can you elaborate a bit?” were the only phrases he would use to respond to the questions which seemed to be making no sense to him.

Round Three- After the bloodbath in the previous round, Kris wanted to go to the restroom and relieve himself from all the tension. As he got up and walked towards the door,in came the next guy armed with a whole bunch of sheets and a laptop. Our friend wanted to ask permission to leave when a voice boomed “We are kinda running behind schedule, so can you fill up this questionnaire before leaving for a break?”. Alas! Kris slouched into the chair and began ploughing through the barrage of questions. Kris spoke “The code on each of these pages is written in a strange format can you please explain?”.
“Well, we use Java here and this is all Java stuff” came the reply from the bloke who was hooked onto the laptop. “J-A-V-A? My skill set includes C# and .NET technologies, that is what I was told over the phone would be asked!” Kris thought. The night mare of an interview continued….

For years together, people have written tomes about how-to-prepare-for-interviews, cracking em’ and how to impress the interviewers. Albeit, there are still distressed souls who do struggle with interviews. As per experts, the best way to start an interview is to take a deep breath and calm down before starting the process. All said and done, there is still an element of luck involved at times which can swing the decision either ways – you might be hired or might not be. All said and done, its an interesting game where the real foe is pressure and the only friend is confidence!

An obituary for my inspiration..

2008-07-24T15:10:00.000-07:00

Any artiste is always blessed with a unique ability to entertain-be it his or her singing,dancing or acting. Historically, there have been very few who could prove their mettle in more than one area. To be specific, there are even fewer who can feel the pulse of their audience, make the audience laugh or cry as per their will. पु. ल. देशपांडे (P.L.Deshpande) was one man who was able to identify the "literary" needs of the common man with great ease. "P.L." as he was fondly called,was admired by the Marathi speaking population because of the subtle way of his writings and plays. The middle class population, esp., found his style of writing suited to their taste.

His style of writing were often influenced by P.G.Wodehouse, the great writer whose comical genius is well-known. The characters immortalized by P.L. include "Sakharam Gatne" the fumbling kid who often amazed everyone with his knowledge of Marathi literature. The narrative explains the journey of Sakharam from being a clumsy bookworm to a mature man who realizes that the world has more to it than just a few words in print. P.L.'s keen sense of observation is evident from all of his works. Just like "Sakharam", P.L. has caricatured the life of a rather average middle class person in his "Asa Mi Asa Mi" which literally means "How I am..". This work of his brings out the everyday troubles of a middle class person piqued by his family-related issues. An interesting aspect of this fable is the transformation brought about in P.L.'s protagonist owing to his children and their new-age values. Each of these characters have left an indelible mark on the minds of the Maharashtrian community, the reason being they are very real, have shortcomings and have a unique persona. Right from the very lovable "Haritatya", a bumbling old man who entertains children with his stories of Shivaji to "Antubarwa" , a person whose wit and sarcasm leave you dumb-founded.

P.L. not only wrote, but he was a great musical genius and gave Marathi Cinema a new lease of life, with classics like "Gulacha Ganpati". His favorite instrument was the harmonium which he played and also performed live concerts. Ably assisted by his wife, Sunita, P.L. had a great journey, travelling all over the world and even wrote travelogues with his own comical touch.

12th June 2000 was the fateful day when the lord ended P.L.'s journey in the mortal world. And it reminded me of one of his short plays- "Sangtwan" (Condolences). The drama is a wonderful take on those people who gather at condolence meetings, but instead have apathy towards the bereaved. In case of P.L., the city of Pune itself had an air of sadness on the day P.L. passed away.I took a taxi to P.L.'s home that day, i alighted from the cab and paid the driver his fare. The man, looking a bit sad, and politlely returned the money, and said "P.L. was one of our own, I won't accept the money".

Hopefully, the Marathi community ,globally can unearth talent which if not equivalent ,but can live upto the name of Purshottam Laxman Deshpande.

May P.L. rest in peace....:)

PORN-o-COPIA

2008-06-30T21:01:00.000-07:00

In countries like India, cable television brought about a huge revolution. The reach of Doordarshan and its limited programs underwent a landmark transformation. Villages and cities started watching newer channels and thus begins my story for this post. In a country where sex is treated like a skeleton in a closet, Sun TV decided to take a huge plunge by offering....wait for it...PORN! Lo and behold, it was the entry of the plump women and portly men in the drawing room of every household. Kids like myself tuned to Sun late nights on weekends with the volume turned off. But much to the dismay of the teen population (and some adults!) the I&B mafia (they ought to have Italian origins!) boycotted these screenings. Late night movies vanished into thin air. It was like, there was no "juice" left in the TV programs except the regular stuff. But, where there is a will, there is a way. People found out that the internet was a rich anthology of porn. Desi hubs were flocked by millions of cyber space enthusiasts to download the latest "clips". It was amusing to know of the exchange of "CD"s containing adult content in every nook and corner of every campus. It was just one big "CD Mafia" which had internet as its core strength. Some of the accounts chronicled mention of students picking up fights for the ownership of these CDs ;).

One infamous account which I remember was when my friend accidentally popped a CD into our college workstation thinking that it contained MATLAB. This incident reportedly happened when my learned friend was trying to demonstrate the use of MATLAB to a group of good looking teenage "chicks". The CD started playing the "MATLAB" component and the display was filled with -men and women shedding clothes...and ...well u got the point rite? One of the "chicks" remarked..."Dude, grow up!" We all laughed till my stomach began aching!

Another of my friends was an enthusiast when it came to porno stuff. As the grapevine has it, he compiled a "Mr.Skin" kinda CD from all the DVDs he had and rented it to people in his colony. I had the privilege to view this CD and was astounded by his astute work!! (aesthetics i meant)

Well, coming to America, porn and the concept of nudity underwent a radical change for the Yankee loving desi folks. Here, porn shops were there right across the street. CDs and DVDs were hitherto either pirated or ripped from the net while I was in India. Here, one could order stuff from sites like E-Bay. It was a surprise to know that the Occident didnot really make a brouhaha when it came to these adult oriented materials. A jolt from the blue kind of thing was when I turned on the TV once to find this- "Katie Morgan's pornography 101". The damsel sans clothing was vividly explaining the history of pornography and its repercussions on American Culture. It meant a journey from black and white movies to the current day HD.America in fact hosts one of the biggest conventions with the theme -"Adult movie stars and their appearances" (Source: "The Girl Next Door" movie).

The essence of writing this apparently "meaningless" essay was to highlight the distinct treatment given to this age old "art" on either side of the globe. It is looked down upon in a country with the largest population density and embraced openly by one with the least density.

FYI, it is a meaningless post....if you reached till here...your patience is admirable ;)

"A journey to the other side...."

2008-05-04T19:34:00.001-07:00

A movie so unique that it defines a genre of its own! Thats my take on the widely acclaimed marathi movie "Uttarayan". The tale of "Durgi" adapted by director Bipin Nadkarni is about a man who meets his childhood love in his twilight years. It is a poignant story of love and affection revolving around the two protagonists- one a widower and the other a woman "Durgi" with a broken marriage. Adding to Durgi's woes are the constant taunts from the society about her character and place in society. The movie begins circa 1960 in Pune where she gets married to a rich barrister who turns out to be a drunkard. Her father-in-law tries to make advances towards her. Caught between the devil and the deep blue sea, she braves her way through life.
Enter "Raghu" the widower who now has the sole purpose ensuring that his son's life in firmly ensconced in comfort and happiness. Blessed with a picture perfect happy family, Raghu meets his old friend and that's when the topic of "Durgi" comes up. "Raghu" vividly remembers his fond memories from teenage years, his doting love for the girl and the pain of seeing her married to some one else but himself. He returns to meet her , only to find her in a state of apathy.
Contemporary marathi movies are pioneering a new trend- adapting a story to fit the settings of the bourgeois who are hard working people with a set of values in life. A touch of realism makes these movies more appealing to the average cinema goer. It makes "Uttarayan" easy to identify with, as it is with other marathi movies. This journey to the other side hits a road block once word gets out about a sexagenarian's "Raghu" wanting to marry "Durgi" a woman with a questionable past.
It is the ease with which the narrative takes its course,which captivates the audience. "Dhund Hote.." in both male and female versions, has been a rendition with a lot of poise. The other songs too are good and allows the user to sink in the emotions experienced by the two protagonists in the movie.
Personally, I hope the Marathi movie makers invest more time and energy to come up with such great storylines to take Marathi cinema to new pedestal,of glory and fame.
:)

The "Middle Class" Guy

2008-04-29T05:43:00.000-07:00

One of the sects of the Mumbai Diaspora which continues to fascinate me, is its middle class. This archetypically modelled section is often attributed a lot of success for producing quality engineers, doctors, accountants and other pros. The reason behind this success is the thought process which the middle class has, mainly its utmost respect for education and hard work.
One of my favorite heroes comes from this background. His acting prowess and the ease with which he sinks into his roles, continues to amaze me. For the past several years, he has worked with the great "Bongs"-Basu Chatterjee, Hrishikesh Mukherjee among a few notable of them. The man i am referring to is none other than- Amol Palekar. He has been the epitome of the "middle class" hero for as long as I remember. His expressions and dialogues in all of his movies spoke a lot about the twists and turns one encounters in various walks of life. It was "Golmaal" where his character bends every rule to secure his foothold in the office of a moustache-loving babu. This movie talks every bit about the aspirations of an easy going young man who yearns to be the next Amitabh! One cannot help but wonder at how he could hold his own amongst the actors of his generation like the great Utpal Dutt. If "Golmaal" was all fun and games, "Choti si Baat" was a story of a young man whose very aim is to charm the lady he likes with his qualities (genetically inherited from his middle class parents!). The only hitch is that he is too introvert to take life into his own hands and be the "Man". "Choti si Baat" spoke about the troubles of a person who never had to make a decision on his own till it came to the issue of a girl he loved. It reflected the middle class upbringing with children living in the shadows of their parents despite reaching a nubile age.
"Baton Baton Mein" was yet another masterpiece for its simple portrayal of a young couple's marriage plans being affected by the decisions of their families. One of the most hilarious scenes from that movie was when the hero and the heroine plan a movie date, only to know that their parents would accompany them as well! Far before movies like "Saathiya" (Alaipayuthey) which showed romance brewing in the otherwise congested local trains of Mumbai, "Baton Baton Mein" started the trend. Well, one could easily understand from the movie that Mumbai had lesser population then!
This post was dedicated to Amol Palekar and the middle class fraternity cause of one reason. Both seem to have vanished from the film circuit. No longer does one find the well educated young man in movies, who Amol so graciously portrayed on the 70mm reel. Its all the Karan Johars and the Shahrukhs who have decided to take film making into their hands with larger than life roles and scenes enacted in the flowery confines of Snow Clad Alps. If only someone thought of the middle class.....:)

Room-Mat-ing......

2008-04-03T20:41:00.000-07:00

Hi,
I am back to writing ....(plz bear me once again!). Since coming to the U.S., I have had a myriad of experiences more personal, than professional. Some are good, others are nasty while there are some which are just strange! Well, the first thing to do when we come arrive is to find a house and people who can stay with ya (by sharing rent of course! we are cheap!). These "people" or "persons" are called "roomies". Many of my close friends too had trouble finding good roomies, whilst others had trouble getting rid of the BAD ones! Well, here are a few observations...about roomies and some pointers to get you started, in general.

1) As many point out, a good friend might not turn out to be a good roomie.
2) Be aware of sweet talking people who approach you for a roomie request. Statistically, these are the ones who want to get work done from you! (ALL OF IT!!)
3) A person who often shows non chalance when it comes to matters of food, mostly is going to suck as a roomie. (Since he/she (if you are lucky!) may not be interested in cooking edible products)
4) History bears testimony to...............(that was just to grab attention!)
The best of friends can be the worst of roomies!! Try to be a roomate with a friend who has a history of being a good roomie as well. OR better still, tie up with a total stranger.
5) When it comes to disagreements, your behavior and personality as well as people skills matter. If you are known to be a bull headed ,headstrong person, just lock horns with the person who is arguing! For people like me (who are diplomatic) you have to walk a tight rope. DONOT hit back and try to pacify the sparring parties. (Machiavelli says this is a good situation to score brownie points!!! on either side!)
6) COOKING-1: This has been a subject over which roomates have split and fought like knights in shining armor fighting over a fair maiden! (with vessels etc..). You can never be sure of the "roomate" being a good cook. Please donot over expect ,neither should you under-expect (hows that for neologism over,under etc).
Some roomies are understanding ,but seem to be a rarity. Most others tend to think they are country cousins of "Tarla Dalal" or "Sanjeev Kapur".( You might suck as a cook if you are wondering who these ppl are!).
7) COOKING-2: IF you are stuck with a bunch of people who cook as bad (or worse than you !!) then here are some suggestions...a)Buy lot of ready to make vegetables from Patel bros or any ready to eat stuff from any grocery store. b)Try to find a house (preferrably one full of good looking girls who cook as well are friendly).Befriend them, and you know what ................( share their groceries ! what did you think?). For those who can ,eat out on the eve of your roomies cooking turn. He/she might do the same if you are a bad cook!!!
8) COOKING-3: The best idea is to get a girlfriend/boyfriend or import one from India and make her/him cook. Girlfriends are a good choice given their proven skills. Guys are a makeshift suggestion for girls who donot like to cook. One more idea for the male gang....try to be good friends with ur girl's roomies! In case you both break up, your stomach doesn't have to suffer!!!
9) RENT: This has been a bane for many students who come to the U.S. "My roomie $^@&*$ doesn't pay a dime!!!" and "Shell out the rent $%$@^" are some of the commonly heard dialogues. Well, I have heard of roomies stealing crockery and spoons,forks etc too! Currently there is no panacea to this situation, but there are a few suggestions. Try to divide bills equally amongst all,instead of one person paying for all. As time passes, the others forget to give their share and it becomes difficult to make them come to terms with the fact that they need to pay to stay!
10) SLEEP: If you are one of those (like me) who donot have your girlfriend as your roomie..then here are a few tips- Tell them blankly if they snore. Guys especially snore and donot admit! Well, if you have roomies who sleep walking and talking..then all the best !

"No Donut for u...Bad Server!!!"

2007-11-13T11:03:00.000-08:00

The era of social networking is changing our perspective towards socialising. Earlier, a few calls here and there and one could get a bunch of buddies together, to watch a game (football for US and cricket for India!).It was simple. With the advent of technology, socialising has become more of an online thing. "Orkut" in particular has come into vogue.
What are the repercussions of this "Orkut" era? Well, there seems to be a clear demarcation between 2 types of user- casual and not-so-casual. The casual user usually lingers around in cyberspace, invites buddies to Orkut and sends out a few messages. He/she is not an avid follower of what happens in anyone elses' "Scrapbook" except his/her own.This user has limited "fan" following ,a couple of "testis" and a few things sprinkled abt his/her profile abt his/her preferences for stuff like cuisine and sports etc.The other type is ,what personally I would call a victim of over socialising. This user is an avid follower of everyone elses' cyber life. It is something like the "grapevine" except now it is public. The one thing which drives this user's incessantly towards orkutting is the openness of its design. You can virtually snoop on anyone and everyone. (Keep track whether your girlfriend is still committed to u!)
"Facebook" offers a plethora of options for the advanced user. "Advanced" can be w.r.t. stuff like Quizzes, Astro stuff and a whole bunch of things other than pure interaction.It's acceptance in U.S. has made it a target for even the terrorists.They use it covertly to gain access to valuable data anywhere in the world.
To be frank and candid, the whole concept gives birth to what can be called "multiple" personas. For e.g. a stupid joke sent to you,may evoke a negative reaction from you. But, to be polite ,you might send an emoticon with a "cheerful" visage. Another instance is blocking of users. In real life ,you may find it tough to avoid people who are a real pain in the a**. But, social networking allows you to block such people from accessing your cyber personalities. Thus, its quite possible for one to forget the way things work in the real world,and be content with their cyber life,which is virtual. But, for now let us enjoy what it is ...without worrying about its long term effects..I gotta rush btw....some one offered me a friend request..WHOA!!! It's a GIRL who did t.."She's Single!!!!".....[:)]

Bhool Bhulaiyya

2007-10-22T11:02:00.000-07:00

Quite often than not have we noticed that Hindi films lack substance. The celluloid scenes are a rehash of many older flicks-some Indian ,others from Hollywood. But being an avid movie goer ,like many, I decided to watch this Akshay Kumar flick.

"Bhool Bhulaiyya" is a remake of an old Malayalam movie which won many accolades for its unique concept. The storyline is different and deals with multiple personality disorder. As a movie buff, I liked the movie and its plot,its USP being the funny action star Akki and the gorgeous Vidya Balan. The last scene focusses mainly on Balan and she does full justice to the audiences' expectations. Bollywood has not experimented much with such kind of genre. Another movie based on this theme is "FightClub" which boasts of action and suspense all the way ,right till the end. If you like movies like "Butterfly Effect" and "Fight Club"--this one should be not missed.

Enjoy "Bhool Bhulaiyaa"! "A movie with giggles if not substance!!"

Ram...

2007-10-21T15:56:00.000-07:00

The festival of Dussehra beckons India to celebrate the event of Lord Ram obliterating Ravana. With the colors of freedom filling the skies of Ayodhya, the Lord returned in all pomp and gaiety from his victory in Lanka. The epic of Ramayana is a marvellous work of my ancestor (surprised?) ,Rishi Valmiki. Ramayana has no shades of grey ;the reason being "Satyayug" as its era. The story speaks of the righteous Dasharatha whose queens donot bear children till he performs some "yagna" to appease the deities. After that, the princes are born to the queens and then the storyline takes a turning point where Ram has to be banished from this kingdom. Then there is another important factor to this whole poetry, Lord Hanuman- the loyal one. Hanuman is said to have fought his own son ,Makardhwaja to free Ram and his brother Lakshman from the clutches of Ravana's collaborators.
In today's context, we can definitely pick and choose values from this story. Not being didactic, I feel the concept of loyalty has a strong bearing on this entire epic. May it be Sita's sacrifice or Lord Hanuman's valor. Another aspect is the concept of strong family ties and that too in the face of adversity. Bharatha, Rama's sibling who inherits the throne himself awaits Ram's return whereas he could have easily had everything to himself. A fascinating twist to this tale is of the enemy ,Ravana. Although he acts against Ram and seizes his wife by force, he is said to been a pious person, a devout individual with strong powers of concentration. This historic foe has qualities which are rare to find ,yet he acts vainglorious. His bravado and lack of respect for the qualities like compassion, love are what bring about his downfall.
The tale ends with Ram's sons reuniting with him and is indeed a touching moment when a father identifies his long lost sons. In Marathi, "Geet Ramayan" is a rendition of songs which are specifically composed for each of the events in "Ramayana". Its last parts are exemplary in the way in which the dramatic moment of Luv and Kush, Ram's sons identify themselves,singing praises of the very father who had to disown his wife Sita.
Being an indian, we ought to ponder over the virtues and vices of this "Purshottam" and not repeat the mistakes which he did. Fighting over Ram Sethu and depriving the coastal area inhabitants of their livelihood is definitely something which one should do on this day. Instead of alluding to myths, the Indian of today needs to brace up for more of incisive decision making and proper analysis of situations.Its not a question of "followers" versus "Atheists". The question is all about making sense and striking a balance between the two.

Flingz

2007-09-07T13:01:00.001-07:00

The most pertinent question since the creation of the cosmos is- "What women want??".Albeit ,many attempts have been made including that of a movie by the same name.While Mel Gibson may be the lucky bastard to actually hear what women think, the real world situation is not so simple. One can say, it's complex the way people make it sound.On hindsight , luck is one of the factors to contend with. There are certain rules which need to be followed in general called "tenets of flirting".
Rule 1: Never show that you are trying to flirt.
Rule 2: You might gain sympathy the first time you moan about your life and sob about it.
Rule 3: Limit "Sob stories" to the minimum. It's boring if you try to score by belting out your frustrations. The girl will kick you where it hurts the most after a while.
Rule 4: Praise the girl's intelligence more than her looks!!! This is for "non-blonde" type behavior.
Rule 5: Don't overdo Rule 4, the story might not have a happy ending!
Rule 6: Always verify that the girl is single, won't hurt to ask impertinent questions and being a little too courageous.
Rule 7: Be practical!! No one should take you for a ride!!
Rule 8: Invest graciously by paying her bills initially. After a few outings she will pay ur rent.
Rule 9: If the signals are right, discard the rules and follow free-will.
Rule 10: THIS IS THE MOST IMPORTANT ONE! YOU CANNOT CHANGE FREE WILL!!!!

P.S. This is just a teaser, myself and a bunch of other heartbroken guys are trying to put this knowledge together in a book. Please contribute graciously with anecdotes and snippets.

Optimism..or Pessimism or..???

2007-08-23T12:43:00.000-07:00

It's been a while since i wrote any stuff ,felt a little left out of the "blogger's world".For years ,people have been categorised as either optimists or pessimists.I met a third kind..the "realists". An optimists is always raring to go, and full of uncurbed enthusiasm. A pessimist is one who always seems to have a glass "half-empty". A realist, is one who is calculated and does'nt like to sit out neither does he/she intends to be too vainglorious.Some of my heroes from the realms of books have been "Don Vito Corleone", a.k.a. The GodFather.In one of the novels called "Sicilian" there is a protagonist who is much like the hero from Sherwood Forest , RobinHood. He robs the rich and offers the money to the needy. Such an "idealistic" person creates many enemies. Don Corleone remarks at the end of the novel about being practical, and trying to remain more of a mortal. "Idealistic Optimism" certainly kills , is what he says. Indirectly, the Don points out that realities of life are harsh and no one can surpass them.You have to face em'.
Another story soliciting my case, is of the Spartans. Personally, I admire King Leonidas for facing the powerful army of Persians with a strength of 1000 men by his side. Yet, on second thoughts,he could have saved Sparta and her army from getting obliterated without a trace.He didnot take the essential precautions before leaving his family as well,despite being aware of traitors. Secondly, he was actually inviting death by defending Sparta's glory with only 300 of his men.
Pessimists, too are a bit of worry in politics especially. They are the ones who always gear up to obstruct any novel idea or concept promulgated by any of the representatives.A coterie of pessmists can wreak havoc by objecting to development projects and new infrastructure.
As a "realist", it is better to "Stay Foolish and Stay Hungry" during battle. But, at other times, the acceptance or rejection of ideas must be dealt with ,with a pinch of "pessimist's" salt..

Bollywood - Hollywood....

2007-07-15T20:34:00.000-07:00

Being an ardent fan of Hindi films, I had been waiting to lay my hands on the latest of em'.My selection (still wondering how!) was "Good Boy, Bad Boy", a flick which regrettfully saw the light of day in the world of thoughtless cinema. Personally, I am not such a critic and love to see people give their best. May it be drama or a "David Dhawan" comedy, its the performance and the energy which light up the silver screen. My personal favorite is ,in fact, "Judwaa" a tale inspired from Jackie Chan's "Double Dragons". Anyways, the flick "Good Boy..." is a story of good people who come under wrong influence and basically is short on everything from script to screenplay. The other day, I watched a "marriage video" a.k.a. "Hum Aapke Hain Kaun" and loved the value system it preached.
My favorite movies are "RHTDM"(even my roomie loves Maddy dada"), "RDB","Judwaa" and many others. The best hindi flicks contain some jingoism and lot of hard hitting dialogues. 1970's was an era which could be better known as the Era of "Manmohan Desai". His concept of unifying people with diverse religions (Amar Akbar Anthony) or any other drama where in the faith people had in themselves was immensely gratifying.
In contrast, the English film fraternity makes a lot of sensible movies, with no songs and more story. The way of narration is distinct ,the screenplay at times is so powerful that the dialogues arent really required. Just imagine "Ocean's 11" with Danni Ocean singing "Dil se" atop a terrace with Nicole Kidman, trying to loot the Bellagio. It would not make sense. Concepts like a great mind trying to don the garb of an "escapist" in "Good Will Hunting" or the role reprised by Al Pacino as a powerful Mafioso in "Scarface" are original. These are people you can relate to, wh are humane and bear the brunt of their eccentricities.Some of the movies like "ShawShank Redemption" are an encyclopaedia in film making. It has no elements like a hindi pot boiler would possess , but really has great twists in the tale of a man who has everything to play for.
With films like "Sivaji" coming into limelight, the movie makers are banking on star power more than story or dialogues. The character essayed by Thalaivar is true to the ethos of Shankar's way of preaching values about social evils. But, the public roots more for "Star Power" of Rajini rather than the concept. Its like Shah Rukh Khan trying to send a patriotic message by prancing around in the Alps. Eventually, the acceptance of films would be based more on the aspects of story and screenplay rather than stars. That would be "Evolution COMPLETE!!!"

"Essence of planning"

2007-07-02T21:07:00.000-07:00

Time and again, our mothers have called upon us to plan. "Planning is essential" is what we have been bombarded with, since the beginning of our life.Like many, I despised those sermons where everyone started giving a lecture on "Time is money" OR " Time Management".It was only when I joined engineering that I understood the reason behind those "lectures".
Many centuries ago, there was war in Kurukshetra, where the Pandavas fought the Kuru army and won the battle. Imagine ,Arjuna being chilled out ,resting in the shade of his umbrella, not bothering about the various military formations! More so, imagine Mama Shakuni, the greatest mythological Gambler, suddenly failing to see the motion of his trusted dice! History would have looked different..perhaps there would be no war at all!!! One of the quotes by the great Archer Arjuna comes as a jolt to people who believe that the indomitable never plan, they are born to win.He explains to his brother Nakula ,as to why he always handpicks his weapons.Especially the arrows, which need to be in a proper shape to avoid air drag.
Today, we need to plan our lives more than ever before. Time seems to fly faster .The ones who can think aeons before and chart out a game plan are most likely to succeed.May it be job or business, we have to forsee the forthcoming dangers which lurk. If caught unawares, the results are disastrous, ranging from firing from jobs to bankruptcy in business. For a person with a job , he or she needs to get into the brain of his/her peers to think as they think. Then be able to do what they could only think of, is another tale. Like wise , in a business, product differentiation is pivotal to the success of any entrepreneur. Failing to make a mark on the consumer would spell doom and a loss altogether.
Ultimately, the one who can see tomorrow, today itself is the one you would place your money on!!

SE7EN !!!!

2007-06-08T12:55:00.000-07:00

Dante Alighieri in his epic poem The Divine Comedy,mentions the seven deadly sins as follows:Lust,Gluttony,Greed,Sloth,Wrath,Envy, and Pride. I came to know about all this only after watching the thriller seven starring the impeccable Morgan Freeman as Officer Somerset who has a mind which works faster than the lawbreakers'. His accomplice is Brad Pitt ,again a superb performance as Detective Willis,who looks passionate about work and his childhood sweetheart played by Gwyneth Paltrow.The tale completely has you involved and tied to the seat without winking even once. Its the underlying thought which suddenly grabbed my attention. Are we thinking about our actions?
If the aforementioned qualities or should I say "vices" then we all are sinners.A Purgatory with seven terraces has to be constructed in this case to absolve us of any such wrongdoings.But , do we care? Its the way life was meant to be. Today's world has mind over matter.We are working at a neck break pace to get what we want."The ends justify the means" is what we idolise.
Expanding the realms of this discussion and porting it to a corporate environment,we can see for ourselves, the effects of this school of thought.The most successful people in this world do value "Ethics". Most others treat it as another word in the lexicon. An ethical workplace nurtures professionalism within an industry. It spurs on people to do things the "right way".
The movie may have a little ghastly ending.It may have over dramatised the situation.
But it certainly sends a message for us to ponder over..

The Pursuit of .....Happ'y'ness!!

2007-05-25T06:53:00.000-07:00

After a round of exams and the nail biting finishes associated with em',I decided to watch a movie.It was the "The Pursuit of Happyness". The movie stars stars like Will smith and Thandie Newton. Its a story of Chris Gardner who inevitably fails in just about everything he tries his hand at, but ultimately stumbles upon a career which he makes his own. But the movie is more than that, since it depicts the tribulations which Chris and his young son Christopher have to undergo.I felt it was a story which each of us can relate to. After all,its this "pursuit" which keeps us going. It also separates the friends from the acquaintances.
The concept of "family values" is highlighted implicitly in this film by the strong portrayals of father-son by Will Smith and his real life son.It tells us that life is not as bad as it may seem. A little smart work with some luck and efforts could turn our fortunes.As the saying goes, "Experience is a cruel teacher,it kills all its students". Real life is not so endearing if the decisions are not correct. Evidently ,the more bitter the experience ,the more enlightened we become.Some people are born with a sense of perfection and impeccably they always arrive at the right decision at the right time. Many others who seemingly "learn with time" have to undergo this catharsis.
Be it the scene at the train station where Will creates a make believe theme park full of dinosaurs for his son, or the moment when he gets hit by a car but still returns to work, Chris Gardener's esprit-de-corps is what inspires you. In real life Chris has made a fortune for himself by dabbling in the stock market. His struggle for existence is an epic in itself meant to be read in order to restore faith in the triumph of human spirit.

A Story of Triumph..

2007-03-19T20:48:00.000-07:00

Success is a magical world known by its aura and charisma.Like a beautiful sculpture adorning the living room of a majestic palace,so is the case with success whose halo transforms man from a mortal to a superhuman. It is said that man can move mountains.I would just twist it a little and rephrase "a confident man...".The Almighty has created everyone alike is an old saying and nothing more.People are created with differences to maintain equilibrium in the universe. A world full of meek and timid beings cannot explore the limits of man's prowess,both mental and physical.A classical example of the legendary "Hank Rearden" exemplifies the above fact.This character penned by Ayn Rand is a specimen I consider my role model.He is an individual who just refuses to be "human".The amount of work he puts in could literally shake the railroad industry. Nevertheless he too has to succumb to the whims and fancies of politics,but not without a fight.
The message is loud and clear."Humans are gone,we need super heroes".Heroics are a part and parcel of man's persona.Too much analysis and a lackdaisical mentality could seldom yield any positive outcomes.As the great Napolean said,we are born to conquer and not get conquered.
Live life and pursue ur dreams..till death does em apart..
Cheers to life!!!

Amitabh's baritones..

2007-03-07T05:40:00.000-08:00

I must admit one thing..Amitabh Bachchan is the GOD of Hindi Cinema.Without him ,hindi movies would be like a Hollywood movie without Denzel Washington or Tom Hanks.His latest movie "Nishabd" is a "refined" adaptation of "Lolita" and speaks about relationships which are seemingly complex.
Earlier Bachchan had lent his voice to songs in "Baghban" directed by Ravi Chopra who also did a "Baabul".The songs were fabulous whenever it was the Big B who had the mike in his hand."Chali Chali" breathed an air of freshness into the romantic saga of a middle aged couple's identity crisis."Holi Khele" was indeed a celebration of joy and happiness all over."Kaante" too had a famous "Chhod na re" song in which the Big man majestically talks about a plan to loot a bank.
Few can match his vocal chords when it comes to singing.The dialogues seem to have a new meaning altogether when he narrates the story with one liners like" Rishte mein to hum tumhare baap lagte hai".We hope to hear many wonderful songs in the near future from him and wish him best of luck...for "Nishabd"!!

Paradoxical failures..

2007-03-06T21:13:00.000-08:00

The ignominy and disgrace associated with defeat is a paradox in itself.On one hand ,the saying is "Try and try till you succeed".On the other hand "Failure is like an orphan".Life manifests itself in many forms and emotions.Some are good ,others suck.The feelings of joy and happiness are often followed by lows.
Ayn Rand,the famous author has summed up human beings and their creativity in her works.Her characters revolve around individuals who have risen from great struggle and dared to dream big.Very often its these very "heroes" whose heroics go in vain.Reason?Winners are few and are envied.The world has plenty of people who seldom manage to keep up with the pace of life.As a result they despise the ones who could conquer the limits of endurance and delve on the path to success.Yet they end up at the receiving end of the stick.
All said and done,real success comes from learning "what went wrong?"That tells the wise apart from the ignoramus.Mere mortals would succumb ,so be a fighter.Brave the odds and salute those who could what you couldn't....

The Three Stooges

2007-03-05T22:05:00.000-08:00

Well,my first post received quite a bit of stick I must admit. Accepting brickbats for that,I still continue with my writings.Have any of you people watched 3 funny men doing slapstick like plucking each other's eyes?If you havent,you really have missed out on one of the best groups who did slapstick comedy."The Three Stooges" were a runaway success during their heydays in Hollywood.Columbia Pictures produced short films of 15 minutes duration which entertained young and old alike.
My first rendezveous with these funny men was on TV on Sony channel.They were really hilarious since each added a different flavour to the act. More so were their antics ,the most famous of which was plucking each other's eyes!!Moe Howard,Larry Fine and Curly teamed up for this wonderful act.Moe had his trademark goofy hairdo.Larry had bits and pieces of hair stuck to his bald plate.Curly enjoyed acts like biting teetn,sporting a flashy smile and rolling all over the ground.If you were a regular viewer of these acts, you would be impressed by the spontaneity of Curly.Actually, whenever he forgot his script,he would improvise by coming up with such unique actions.
All said and done,they added a touch of sarcasm at times to the plot.The movie"a Nasty Spy" had Moe in a get up which bore semblance to Hitler.The stooges could get the message across in a subtle but effective way.
For some their acts would be "rubbish" ,but on a personal level,they were extremely adorable.
Their popularity reached new heights when they were immortalised in form of toons.Curly had to leave the act and was replace by Shemp Howard.Still the popularity was unmatched for any other show which had comedy as a genre.
Thanks for tickling our funny bone ...Hail the Stooges!!!

Be Human!!!

2007-03-05T21:48:00.000-08:00

Hi everyone,
I welcome you to a journey which would unearth mysteries and secrets hiterto unknown.I would try to reach the sanctum realms of powers which you could experience but could never describe.The world is a paradox of sorts with things happening at the right place at the right time for many people and vice versa for the rest.
For those who get it right the first time..its called "excellence".Rightly so,and I must agree that excellence does matter.Being mediocre has its shortcomings in today's world fraught with risks like those of losing job ,losing a girl and so on.But there are things which seem so little but mean so much.A person who is blessed with good qualities like kindness and compassion may not be good at studies and maybe an underachiever.In terms of life,these people are the true champions whom the spirit of humanity salutes.Virtues take a back seat in a race and wars are fought with no a holds-barred approach.Humanity is above these and has the power to subdue the most vicious of opponents like anger,greed etc.
Now is a good time to remind us of the time when we were born:"The Age of innocence".Today's world is full of negative thoughts and feelings of jealousy.A spirit of "world harmony" can mean a lot in today's context.It doesnot matter whether you are "Black" or "White".What matters is are you human enough?